Look at this futhamucka here!!!

15 04 2008

Aight…this is my last post of the day, so I leave ya’ll with this.  This is soccer player Djibril Cissé.  Some may have other opinions, but this dude looks a wretched hot mess.  I’m not talking about his soccer skills or his life.  I’m currently looking at these hot mess pics like “Who vetoed this Bill of Foolishness?”  Synonyms such as “Bird-money” and “angry toliet brush” has been mentioned in relation to these pics.  Thanks Bossip!  (more pics below)

Posted by Justin Time™ Read the rest of this entry »

Popularity: 17% [?]

Who in the hell left the gate open?

11 04 2008

What in the Mark Althavan Andrews is this gold-plated hot mess? I pray that they ain’t making a Meteor Man 2. He’s making this too easy for cops now. Every time he hugs a little girl, they turn green from his cheap gold-plated ass. I got to give it to him tho, he’s almost as creative as this dude…

(shoutout to illseed for this pic)



Posted by Justin Time™

Popularity: 47% [?]

A lil Morning Eye Candy for the Fellas (and some ladies too)

9 04 2008

Usually I don’t do this but ah… Read the rest of this entry »

Popularity: 22% [?]

Please Say The Baby

8 04 2008

Let me just start this off by saying whoever is managing Emmanuel Lewis is dead wrong for letting him do this. Jazze Pha’s hamhock pizza or whatever the FUCK it was is enough abuse one person should have to endure.

If I didn’t know Wayne just got some of those tattoos, I wouldn’t be surprised or doubt that he came out of the womb with them. He just seems like he was that kind of… child. Touched would be putting it lightly.

I’m sure some of you don’t believe this is real and are ready to give me the “PHOTOSHOPZ” treatment. Gotcha, bitches! I do my research. Sometimes.

Thanks Meosha

Posted by J

Popularity: 19% [?]

Not Safe For Work, Life, The Afterlife…

8 04 2008

Kim, I am holding you personally responsible for ruining my appetite after seeing this. What in God’s name. These kids are in high school? Homedude needs to pick up a basketball after class. And she can go get her freak on at Hot Dog On A Stick, because this? This is uncalled for and I mean it. Normally you have to PAY to see this kind of freaknastiness (though someone should pay me for this). YouTube is gonna pull this down at any second, so if you’re sick and twisted, watch it while you can.

Here are some questions from Kim that I want answered, as well:

Who was working the camera? Why did dude need to take a drink in between? Why did the camera man double as the prop guy? [I especially died at that Ikea polka dot bedspread -J] What the HELL?!?

Posted by J

Popularity: 27% [?]

Feet Patrol (by Msantina)

8 04 2008

“I know I’m turning into a feet patrol Nazi but look at Maneka feet! It looks like she’s been kicking powder in her Heidi 2008 clogs.  I guess running behind Ursher keeps her so busy she can’t baby oil them thangs down. Oh and nothing about her says ’stylist.’”  - Msantina

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Popularity: 16% [?]

Beyasha’s Got Hos In Different (Country) Codes!

4 04 2008

This is a fan video made featuring all fiftyleven billion fans of Beyoncé from all over the world, but particuarly Spain and Brazil. There’s even someone from Iraq in here! This is hilarious because it starts off with photos/footage of Beyoncé while playing “Brown Eyes” in the background. This is taking obsession to a new level! Listening to the lyrics and seeing her face during it just made me fall out because I believe whoever made this is maniacally in love with her.

This is an army of Beyoncé stans. They could wage war on anybody.

I don’t expect you to sit here and watch all these pictures scroll by (unless you’re into that kind of thing — a lot of metrosexual looking dudes and some Polish girls Glamour Shot’d up), but please, if nothing else, scroll to around eight minutes or so. This is where the video really gets out of hand. I collapsed at the look on the little Dakota Fanning’s face at 8:15.

Thanks “I hate Beyoncé stans”

Posted by J

Popularity: 29% [?]

The Top 40 Hip-Hop Blogs

31 03 2008

Number 8!

Directly quoted from www.wooohah.com:

Some associates of mine who are in business school have developed a new blog measurement system called the Blog Performance Indicator (BPI).The BPI measures a percentage of Alexa traffic, Technorati score, Digg, del.icio.us, RSS feeds, social bookmarking reader usage and how much the site has grown in the past month and compares it vs. other “similar category” blogs.

The BPI is supposed to be the most accurate measurement of how one blog performs vs. another and the competition as a whole. I was able to convince them to run the scores for hip-hop blogs. Over 100 active hip-hop blogs (more than 1 post a week) were rated with over 3,000 active hip-hop blogs found in the nation…[CLICK HERE FOR MORE ON THE STORY]

Big ups to everybody. We couldn’t have done it without you. With new looks and changes in the coming weeks, we should climb the charts. Continue to spread the word. Thanks again,

AHM Staff

Popularity: 15% [?]

Multiple Choice Question of the Day

29 03 2008

(This is from The 1st. Annual Fierce Awards)

Q. Who (or what) is this?

A). A wax figure
B). A tranny
C). A hot bowl of foolishness on her its head
D). Jade from ANTM.
E). All of the above

Click here for more pics.

Posted by Justin Time™

Popularity: 22% [?]

Mess of the Moment: Free (former host of 106 & Park)

25 03 2008

No Free! No! What a tragedy. Never in a million years would I have thought Free would look like a hot bowl of mess. (*SMH*). LaLa is like, “hurry up and take this damn picture.” Honestly, she looks pregnant to me. That’s my only justification of it, but there’s no reason to look like…

Posted by Justin Time™

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Popularity: 21% [?]

The Pied Piper Says: “JA’MON, KIDS!”

25 03 2008

After all the years it’s been open, we are finally getting a sneak peek of what Michael Jackson’s Neverland Ranch looks like on the inside now that the space is in danger of being auctioned off. There’s a lot of what you would expect… carousels, ferris wheels and shit, but there was also this lithograph, photographed near the entrance, of Michael leading a group of kids down a path.

I’m sorry but I fell out when I saw this! I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, I really don’t think Michael has ever molested any kids, I think he thinks he’s a child himself, but DAMN! It could be my eyes deceiving me but it looks like that line of children reaches all the down the bend! Someone call Dora the Explorer and let her know she needs to call Child Services so they can LET HER PEOPLE GO.

(Image Source)

Posted by J

Popularity: 16% [?]

Clean & Clear That Ho

21 03 2008

Somebody, somewhere in Soulja Boy’s camp thought it would be a good idea for them to show us him getting a pimple the size of Jamaica popped off the side of his head. The best part is he didn’t even do it! He had one of his goons do the shit for him. Now that’s some Mariah Carey shit for you. Forget weed carriers, when the gravy train conductor is 16, you may or may not have to pop zits for him.

I was trying to think of some good jokes but all the good ones were already said in this video. “That pimple has a pimple!” “That pimple is pregnant!” “Like Plies said, bust it baby!”

That was foul beyond foul’s belief. It looked like he got shot at the end! I didn’t know that much blood could come from a pimple. I thought his ass was gonna bleed out!

Posted by J

Popularity: 31% [?]

If HE Thinks Your Breath Is Bad…

19 03 2008


Warning: adult language.

Flavor Flav is not a clean-looking individual. He reminds me of one of those sponge pads with the rough sides you use to scrape grease off pans. I’m sure flies congregate on his head all the time, have meetings about which pile of dogshit they’re gonna land on next, etc.

It follows then that his breath probably smells like some sort of dying animal that crapped itself in fear. So when I saw this clip, I just about fell out.

I’m not even watching “Flavor of Love” this season, but apparently ya girl Shy has a halitosis problem. If Flavor Motherfucking Flav thinks your breath stinks, it could probably burn the surface of the sun. I’m surprised I didn’t get stank-o-vision watching this video! Someone call HAZMAT.

Shout out to Antina

Posted by J

Popularity: 47% [?]

Blair Witch + Stupid = Romeo & P. Miller’s New “Film”

19 03 2008

Romeo and his pops Master P will star in a new horror film called The Pig People. I couldn’t make this shit up if I tried.

Rap mogul Percy “Master P” Miller and his son Romeo are preparing to star in their first full-length feature together in the new horror movie The Pig People.

The Pig People will star Romeo as “TJ,” one of five college students who venture into a haunted forest to shoot a documentary for their film class.

The students venture into the woods seeking to debunk an 18th century Louisiana myth surrounding the fearsome, half-human, half-swine “pig people.”

“I’ve never done a horror movie before,” said Romeo, who plans on majoring in film while playing sports at USC.

It’s a different kind of acting and the challenge is really allowing me to take my game to the next level,” Romeo told AllHipHop.com “We’re gonna make the audience jump out of their seats with this.”

In addition to actor Daeg Faerch (Halloween), Romeo’s father, reformed gangsta rapper Master P., is co-starring in the movie as the film’s villain.

The Pig People is being produced by Vault Load Films and directed by David Gueringer and is scheduled to be released in 2009. (Source)

O, RLY Romeo? Some people go to Julliard or even join a Shakespeare troupe down at their local junior college, Romeo does The Pig People to up his acting game. Hey, different strokes for different folks.

I know I’m gonna end up renting this when it comes out straight to DVD some night when I’m bored. Getting drunk and watching movies like this is one of my joys in life. Like I said, different strokes…

Is it me or is something just “off” about father and son working together so much? Maybe I just have a twisted mind but I think it might be time for P to take Keyshia’s advice and “let it go”.

Posted by J

Popularity: 28% [?]

DMX: “What The F*** Is A Barack?!”

17 03 2008

In the midst of an interview with XXL Magazine, DMX revealed he had no idea who — or what — Barack Obama is.

Are you following the presidential race?
Not at all.

You’re not? You know there’s a Black guy running, Barack Obama and then there’s Hillary Clinton.
His name is Barack?!

Barack Obama, yeah.

What the fuck is a Barack?! Barack Obama. Where he from, Africa?

Yeah, his dad is from Kenya.
Barack Obama?

What the fuck?! That ain’t no fuckin’ name, yo. That ain’t that nigga’s name. You can’t be serious. Barack Obama. Get the fuck outta here.

You’re telling me you haven’t heard about him before.
I ain’t really paying much attention.

I mean, it’s pretty big if a Black…
Wow, Barack! The nigga’s name is Barack. Barack? Nigga named Barack Obama. What the fuck, man?! Is he serious? That ain’t his fuckin’ name. Ima tell this nigga when I see him, “Stop that bullshit. Stop that bullshit” [laughs] “That ain’t your fuckin’ name.” Your momma ain’t name you no damn Barack. (Source)

If it ain’t about dogs or crack, you can venture a guess that DMX doesn’t know what’s going on in any given topic.

I know Earl better sit down acting like his name is so sexy.

Posted by J

Popularity: 27% [?]