A Hot Mess!

Scott Storch’s yacht, the $20 million (that’s not a typo) “Tiffany” (that’s not a typo either), was recently auctioned on eBay and sold for approximately $2.5 mil because Kermit couldn’t pay the notes on this bad boy girl. From the bidding page:

THE BOAT IS BEING SOLD UNDER DISTRESS ,OWNER BOUGHT HER AND NOW GOT SHORT ON MONEY. OWNER STARTED REFITTING THIS YACHT A MONTH AGO.The bottom has been done and the boat will be going in the water on march 9 ,2008: props have been resurfaced and balanced,rudders resealed,zincs replaced,bottom job.The green color will be replaced by beige,vip and guest room will have different suede color than purple and pink.A jacuzzi might be added to upper deck.A 300k project will start and after that the price of the boat will be raised.Tiffany gives you the luxury of a stylish Art Deco interior. The clean classic lines of the Art Deco theme create a harmonious atmosphere for total relaxation. She is a “yacht with a pedigree” having been built at the world renowned Devenport Shipyard in England,and joins their list of many famous clients including The Royal Yacht Britannia and M/Y Leander. The systems and the decor on Tiffany are befitting the finest of the worlds largest yachts .To replace Tiffany in today’s market would cost well in excess of 19 Million Dollars .The owner will consider taking a boat in trade or even property. Tiffany was built to the best and highest standards.The boat sold in 1995 for 11.9 million dollars when boats of that size sold for 4 and 5 million max.It was built as a ship .The boat is undergoing a refit as we speak.It already had a complete paint job in 2006/07.New carpet and furniture in 2007.There was around 600k spent on it.It is also getting a full service done on it during the sale period.The boat has 4 staterooms 3 of which have their own jacuzzi bath tubs,it also has 3 crew cabin with their own heads.The boat has an immense living room. (Source)

Dang, “short on money”! They really blew up Scotty’s spot with that one. Not that no one knew he was broke but this is really just adding insult to injury. Seeing your $20 million “investment” (I use the word in quotes because you can’t really call a boat the size of Venus a practical investment) up on eBay has got to be almost as painful as realizing you spent $20 million on something that wasn’t… well, a house or something. Unless you like living on water. And I mean on it in the literal sense, not just next to it.

There are a bunch of pictures on the page as well. The beds look like they were made in a hurry, like the Repo Man kicked Scott’s ass in a hurry and then had a bunch of dudes clean it up as much as possible before George came in with the Polaroid. I really fell out at this one though (blue MSPaint chicken scratch is the work of yours truly, in case there were any confusion; click to enlarge):

Posted by J

Popularity: 16% [?]

Mario will star on the next season of “Dancing With The Stars”, which, in case you weren’t sure, pretty much sums up the status of his career as a singer. Um. Yeah.

Showing that he’s more than just a voice, R&B star Mario is set to show off his footwork on the ABC hit reality series “Dancing With The Stars.”

According to the Baltimore Sun, the 21 year-old will be a part of this season’s new cast, which will see Mario and 11 other celebrities working on their dancing skills. The show, which will debut on March 17, is in it’s sixth season and was the second highest rated show of 2007, behind “American Idol.”

In addition to the young crooner, the show will also welcome famed Olympic figure skater Kristi Yamaguchi, tennis star Monica Seles and actor Steve Guttenberg, among others. (Source)

I mean, shoot, I ain’t mad at Kristi Yamaguchi. I’m sure that Olympics endorsement money is just about SAPPED. DRY. But Mario? I mean I know he’s not Usher but isn’t he selling himself a little short here? Or am I giving him too much credit? I don’t know. Or care, really. “Cryin’ Out For Me” was my cut, though. Apparently not many other people felt the same.

Posted by J

Popularity: 50% [?]

Here’s a shocker. Foxy Brown’s album Rikers’ Don Diva or whatever it’s called is being pushed back yet again.

The Brooklyn bred MC will now see the release of her LP, Brooklyn’s Don Diva, re-scheduled for the second time. The album, which had been pushed back to a February 5th release date, now won’t be released until this spring. Chaz Williams, Foxy’s manager, told SOHH the decision was made so the rapper would not have to forgo promotion of the album and enjoy a proper release.

“The album release date has been changed at the direction of Foxy and Black Hand Management,” Williams said. “Foxy will be out in April and we wanted her to be able to participate in the promotion of this album.”

“This also gives us the opportunity to get out the proper visuals and videos to support her records, as well as the opportunity to do live radio promo and tour in support album release,” he added. “This was a business decision we felt served our best interest as an independent record company.” (Source)

Damn, no tentative date, just “this spring”? We couldn’t even get a hint bigger than that one? This is almost as bad as when my dude Soulman asked Mya when her album was coming out and she was like “Uhhh. 2007. Or some year starting with ‘2′.”

If Foxy participating in the promotion of the album has anything to do with her throwing phones at Koreans, spitting on people and/or wearing blue eyeshadow, it might be better for them to go ahead and release this mess without her help.

Do they really think she’s going to be out for long? With her track record she’ll go back in August for eating a baby.

Posted by J

Popularity: 15% [?]

I don’t need Sylvia Browne & Montel Williams to predict Soulja Boy’s future — Coolio is the living legend who already serves as the template LOL. Jibbs, Mims, Arab, Pop It Off Boyz, Jason Fox, Shawty Lo…invest that money right or you’ll be on an Internet TV channel looking like a Chuck E. Cheese character very, very soon.

Seriously, you know what? Where are his friends? It ain’t even Red Lobster paying him to look like that!

*Warms up some butter and garlic sauce*

If you can’t beat ‘em, eat ‘em!

Spotted at XXL

Posted by The IPS

Popularity: 36% [?]

YouTube - Direct Video Link 
Amerie’s NBA on TNT Promo

LOL, I’m sorry I just can’t take Amerie seriously. She might be big across the pond, but we in America know better. I hope she got one of them “ballers” phone numbers…she’s gonna be sitting down somewhere soon LOL. She’d be a good trophy wife!

The minute that broad started krumping “Tommy the Clown” style in this vid, I laid on the floor in the dark and popped in my “Ms. Kelly” CD. And then I was DOUBLE dead and buried when she did the lil’ “slow wind” move.

Amerie’s beautiful man-hands and all, and I think she has a modicum of talent, but this tragedy just needs to end!

Posted by The IPS

Popularity: 21% [?]

The Plastic One has gotten a release from her contract and some are speculating she is debating signing to Imperial Records, the same “indie” label arm of Capitol Records that Fat Joe is signed to:

Rapper Lil’ Kim has left Atlantic Records and intends to release her upcoming as-yet-untitled album independently.

On DJ Kay Slay’s Sirius Satellite Radio show “Streetsweeper Radio” last week, Kim shared that she harbors no ill feelings toward Atlantic. She said she was afraid to release her music independently several years ago but is now more comfortable in her knowledge of the music business to work her project.

It’s rumored that the MC will join Capitol Music Group’s independent arm, Imperial Records, however Kim’s management was unavailable for comment. Fat Joe is also signed to Imperial.

Lil Kim’s upcoming album, which was originally slated for February, is now tentatively set for April or May 2008.
 
Kim’s Atlantic swan song, 2005’s “The Naked Truth,” has sold 394,000 copies in the United States, according to Nielsen SoundScan. (Source)

394K? Dang, that’s it!? I thought “Lighters Up” was a hood anthem or some ish. I guess not. People put the lighters up and kept their money in their pockets evidently LOL.

Can Kim recapture her lyricism and ferocity on the mic, or will she be doing Remy Ma disses for the next 3 months on “mixtapes”? I don’t know.

Between her indie release and Foxy’s indie release, Khia’s new record deal and Trina’s new album, is 2008 the “Year of The Return of the Female Rapper”? I think all these chicks should just get in one big group and cut some hot posse records with them all rolling around in black tar Christina Milian style on the cover LOL. Meh.

I won’t be happy until Kang Latifah gives me a jazzy hip-hop album a la Guru’s “Jazzmatazz” series. I think that would be hot.

Posted by The IPS

Popularity: 27% [?]

Spotted at Complex

Why he look like Scott Storch with brownie crumbs on his face? LOL. I think it’s the glasses. Or wait…the below picture of Scott Storch and New-Yo…it looks like them two had a baby and the picture above is the outcome ROFL.

I guess Fat Joe, I don’t believe you. You need more people!Previously: Fat Joe - “I Won’t Tell” Feat. J. Holiday

Posted by The IPS

Popularity: 19% [?]

Spotted at Kevipod

Jordin Sparks covers Your Prom magazine.

Now granted, I’m probably not the target demo for this magazine, but dang…I feel like she’s been “squished” onto the cover or something LOL.

How they just gonna demote ole’ girl from “American Idol” to “Prom Idol”?! I wouldn’t have let that copy go to press.

Her CD hasn’t been doing to hot, and she seemed to fade from the radar pretty quickly…and with Ruben Studdard, Taylor Hicks and Katherine McPhee all being dropped/leaving their labels, is it safe to say that A.I. has just become decent television but is losing steam as far as being a “star factory”? Even I don’t want to watch past the audition phase anymore.

Her CD was hmmmmm…BAD…even a duet with Chris Breezy couldn’t save it. I’d have to check the Soundscan, but wasn’t her CD the lowest selling or debuting project ever for an American Idol winner?

Posted by The IPS

Popularity: 19% [?]

Cause she knew and we all knew that the one before looked straight up like Lil’ Kim’s old joint. Hai tittayballs! Welcome! *waves*

She’s delirious though if she thinks anyone is checking for this record. I’d rather hear Khia & Princess from Crime Mob do a collabo called “Hot Grease & Hot Combs” featuring vocals by Ms. Peachez. Seriously. At least I could laugh.

This cover looks like Jay-Z told her to park his Bentley out back one day and she ran off to The Picture Place instead and got her friend to snap a few photos in the parking lot before Jay wondered where she went. “Quick girl, snap the picture!! Hurry up!!” Girl stop!

Spotted at Nah Right.

Posted by The IPS

Popularity: 20% [?]

Khia got a new record deal.

Kim is too busy using T-Pain’s voicebox to put out a new album, Remy is about to go away for a nice bid and be cell mates with Foxy, who can’t even put on her Lee Press-On’s to go to court in a timely manner. What does that leave? KHIA! Sloppy seconds anyone?

Female rapper Khia, best known for her 2002 single “My Neck, My Back (Lick It),” has inked a new recording deal with Atlanta-based Big Cat Records. After releasing her debut LP, Thug Misses on Artemis Records in 2002, Khia took the independent route for her two subsequent projects. “Signing Khia to the label was a no-brainer. Everyone knows who she is. She knows how to make a hit and we are happy to have her on board”, Big Cat President Mel Breeden said in a statement. The raunchy MC’s first project on Big Cat will be her third solo album, Nasty Muzik, which is due out this spring. The first single, called “What They Do” featuring Gucci Mane, is scheduled to hit radio in February. “I am extremely excited about my new deal,” Khia said of her new venture. “My third album will definitely show my growth as an artist and producer [GIRL STOP!]. I’ve been through a lot and my lyrics will prove it.” (source)

Who knew Big Cat Records was selling enough Gucci Mane “Freaky Girl” ringtones to get they paper up enough to sign The Thug Misses! Great day in the morning! Just what I been waiting for — a new Khia record. Put that right below my wish for Katt Williams’ new record & Fonzworth’s new single “R.A.I.N.B.O.W.S.” or w/e LOL.

I think Ms. Peachez was ROBBED. “Fry That Chicken” gets more play on my iPod than “Snatch The Cat Back.” I’m just saying.

“What’s Beef? Beef is when the b*tch titties looking like they sleep / Beef is when the clothes lookin’ like dirty sheets” - Trina, “What’s Beef?”

I’m going to send my cousin that’s locked up Khia’s new promo shots and box of cigarettes. That’s sure to brighten his day!

Khia column game is poppin’ though. Maybe I should start me a column LOL!

Posted by The IPS

Popularity: 20% [?]

I mean REALLY. I’m all for respecting our elders and giving props where it is due…but come on. I LOVE “Run’s House,” I watch it religiously (<—LOL!), but this is getting out of hand. No one is checking for a new Rev. Run record. No one is checking for a “Team Blackout” record either by his son & his weed carriers.

I honestly don’t think I’d even waste the hard drive space on downloading this. Not trying to put my mouth on “Da Mand Of Gawt” though *cough*. I’ll just watch/listen to the 30 second opening theme to “Run’s House” & looking at Vanessa. That’ll do me just fine.

Run-D.M.C.’s Rev. Run has signed a worldwide recording deal with U.K. independent label Craze Productions. His new album is being recorded in New York and is due in the first quarter; it features a guest spot by Kid Rock, with whom Run will tour this spring.

Simmons will also tape the fifth season of his MTV show “Run’s House” later this year.

Craze Productions has an extensive digital catalog of hip-hop tracks and has previously focused on Web and mobile downloads as well as ringtones. The new signing marks a move into physical releases for the London-based label, which will Run’s album in stores worldwide. (source)

Let me go get my Mr. Microphone out the closet and break out my Fruity Loops. I’m bout to blowuptuate like So Over Boy with my new hit song “Do Ya Smell Me? (Who Pooted?!)”. It’ll be on iTunes and Myspace in 25 minutes.

Oh and I was watching the show last night and noticed that Russell Simmons had a lisp! SAY WHAT!? Can I get him on 16 bars and J. Holiday on the hook? LOL. “Lisps ov da world UNITE!”

^^ Was that too much?

Posted by The IPS

Popularity: 29% [?]

brightcove - Direct Video Link 

Chingy…OK. We don’t believe you…you need more people. LOL. Nah, he probably ain’t gay. When the lights on. It ain’t got nothing to do with the tattoo though…I ain’t never even thought about his tattoo LOL.

BTW, why come ya’ll didn’t go buy Chingy’s new record!? It’s only sold 44,576 copies since it was released on the December 11th.

Wow. Did anyone even bother to DOWNLOAD that joint even?!

I bet Def Jam is mad they spent that advance on signing him BACK from Capitol. I think Chingaling needs to start working on that real estate license ROFL. He can get tips from Ronnie from BBD/NE.

Posted by The IPS

Popularity: 25% [?]

XXL basically sums up everything that could ever be said about why no one particularly cares for Lil’ Roof Ruff anymore. To me, his ego is like Kanye’s without the artistic creditability to back it up. So, they crafted a list of “26 Reasons Why Sir Shad Gregory Moss gets no respect” and I couldn’t agree more wholeheartedly LOL.

I’m sure Omarion & Bow Wow will release a joint statement expressing their zestiness asking us to respect their privacy as partners them as men in the music business. LOL. Let me stop.

BTW, “Face Off” has sold 107,146 units since it’s release.

The list is after the jump!

Posted by The IPS

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Popularity: 38% [?]

If you pay for ringtones, you are really an idiot. Sorry! You can make them joints for free ya’ll! Legally! Most phones play mp3’s. Shame on you for supporting ”Pop, Lock & Drop It”!

AT&T on Thursday announced its top 10 most downloaded ringtones of 2007:

1.  Shop Boyz - “Party Like a Rockstar”
2. Mims - “This Is Why I’m Hot”
3. Soulja Boy - “Crank That (Soulja Boy)”
4. Nickelback - “Rockstar”
5. Akon - “Don’t Matter”
6.  T-Pain - “Buy You A Drank (Shawty Snappin)”
7. Hurricane Chris -”A Bay Bay”
8. Sean Kingston - “Beautiful Girls”
9. Huey - “Pop, Lock & Drop It”
10. Fergie - “Big Girls Don’t Cry”

I don’t know what’s worse — ALL the songs on this list, or the fact that Grammy-nominated artist (gag) Soulja Boy was beat by a Mims (what is a mims?!). If I was T-Pain, I’d be offended. LOL @ Nickelback being thrown in for good measure. Two songs with “Rockstar” in the title? See, no one wants to be a DOCTOR or LAWYER anymore.

I make my ringtones all year long, and MY top ringtone of 2007 was “I Meant You No Harm/Jimmy’s Rap” by Eddie Murphy from the Dreamgirls soundtrack. NOT the sad part — the following part (sing it with me if you know it!):

“Jimmy want a rib
Jimmy want a steak
Jimmy want a piece of yo’ chocolate cake!

Jimmy got soul
Jimmy got soul
Jimmy got, Jimmy got
Jimmy got souuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuul!”

I stop TRAFFIC with that joint right thurr!

What was your top ringtone of 2007?

Posted by The IPS

Popularity: 37% [?]

Mary’s wig called and told me to thank everyone for purchasing her latest album.

Queen Mary’s latest release “Growing Pains” is on track to sell at least 600K+ (hit stores this week), but not enough to beat out The Almighty YT’s representative Josh Groban’s Christmas album “Noel,” which has been selling faster than you can say “50% off everything at Wal-Mart!” His album has increased in sales and stayed at #1 for the last 4 weeks I believe, bucking the trend of debuting at #1 and falling down the charts with dangerous speed.

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Popularity: 19% [?]