Al Drops Down And Gets His Eagle On

25 04 2008

Sad news out of the bearding world — the business partnership marriage between Star Jones and Al Reynolds has come to an end. Who could have seen this coming? We’ll start with Stevie Wonder walking in a thick fog after being spun around in a circle 17 times.

Star reportedly has an “iron-clad prenup” which is good since she would have looked REAL STUPID had she not since she goes around telling any dog, cat or baby that will listen that she’s a lawyer.

We’ve also learned that Star cares deeply about Al and wants them both to be happy and fulfilled, and because she believes that marriage is a covenant with God, she did not enter into the decision to divorce lightly. Sources also report that the couple, who married in 2004, hadn’t lived together for over a year — in fact, sources say that the honeymoon was over shortly after the marriage began.

In terms of where things stand today, we can report that Star is currently weathering the media firestorm with girlfriends in Costa Rica — she’s expected to come back the U.S. tomorrow. She had been planning to attend the Kentucky Derby on May 3rd, but it’s now unclear as to whether she’ll be going.

Al, on the other hand, has been holed up in his Miami condo since the divorce news broke, though the night before Star filed for divorce, a sweaty Al was spotted dancing up a storm in Miami. (Source)

I can just see Al in his best freakum dress down at the Manhole throwing up $100s he had stashed under the staircase. You know he has that “getaway money” piling up in the bank! He’ll use that cash to get into high profile events and catch his next beard. It will probably be Jennifer Freeman.

I originally picked this picture because he looks like a festive Speed Racer but what I wanna know is what he was doing at Mystic Tan?!

Posted by J

Popularity: 35% [?]



What Kind Of Music Does THIS Being Make?

22 04 2008

I was thinking more “What What (In The Butt)”, but apparently he’s trying to be the next Sammy Davis. Airbrush me shocked.

In a page out of Hustle and Flow, Academy Award-nominated star Terrence Howard hosted a lunchtime listening session Monday for his debut album: Terrence Howard – Me and the Band of Kings.

Howard, dapper in a three piece gray suit, drummed his chopsticks along to the 11-song disc as it played for a room full of journalists at the Sony Club in New York. The album chronicles everything from broken relationships on “It’s All Game” to self-reflection on “Plenty” and the celebration of love on his single, “Love Makes You Beautiful.”

Howard told the audience that he began writing songs at age 16 in his “rainbow colored notebook,” and discussed recording an “emotionally sobering” song that began as a letter to his ex-wife. The collection of songs is highly reminiscent of a live, big band, jazz feel, which Howard backs up by playing the guitar.

The album is currently slated for a September release. (Source)

OK, I just died on that “rainbow colored notebook” tip. I actually think he’s fucking with me. This is making my job too easy. Maybe he and Cam’Ron can compare notes?

Posted by J

Popularity: 29% [?]



So Many Questions

16 04 2008

* Why is Sisqo at the CMT Awards?
* In fact, how did he even get past security?
* How much did the time machine ride to 1999 to get that hair bleach cost?
* Is that guido look intentional or could he not afford the top three buttons?
* He hasn’t pawned that dragon chain yet?
* Why is he so short that I can see the “X” on the carpet where they are told to pose for pictures? SMH.

Props to Go Fug Yourself

Posted by J

Popularity: 20% [?]



Lil’ Llama Blowin’ Up Spots!

3 04 2008

 

Lil’ Mama talked to SOHH about her experience being on tour with artists like Chris Brown, Bow Wow, Soulja Boy and others, saying it was “like high school”.This is hilarious because she is trying to play it off like she had so much fun but you can tell she was focused more on the negative aspects. Egos, jealousy and boyfriend-girlfriend situations… I have no problem believing any of this, but the part that’s funny is she only mentioned MALE artists other than herself! I got this mental image of Omarion storming into Woof Woof’s dressing room and asking him why Chris Brown’s body oil was in his car.

Posted by J

Popularity: 25% [?]



Let Me Tell Ya ‘Bout My Beeeest Friend

1 04 2008

Rihanna has pulled the “brother/sister” and/or “best friend” card on her relationship with Chris Brown.

Rihanna is hoping to quash rumours she is dating fellow R+B star Chris Brown once and for all - by insisting their relationship is like “brother and sister”.

The pair has caused much speculation over the nature of their relationship since they were photographed frolicking in a Jamaican swimming pool together last month.

They further fuelled rumours last month after they were photographed leaving a London hotel together - but the Umbrella star insists Brown is more like a family member than a love interest.

She says, “I won’t say that we’re just friends - me and Chris are really best, best friends. We both started our careers around the same time. He is one of the only people in the industry … I trust and hang out with all the time.

“We are best friends, honestly, like brother and sister. If he was a boyfriend, I would say that.” (Source)

Mm’hmmmm. I bet they paint each others’ toenails and everything. The wording of this is “statement” so off!

I understand where she was going with this because it’s pretty much the oldest denial trick in the book, but I’m wondering if she consulted with Norbert on this one because… well, you know.

In all seriousness, I think this is a publicity stunt either way because we all know Rihanna is saving herself for Fred Savage and Chris is saving himself for Michael Jackson.

Posted by J

Popularity: 17% [?]



“Basketball Is The One With The Hoops… Right?”

7 03 2008

Usher has become a partial owner of the Cleveland Cavaliers.

“I am excited about becoming part of this ownership group and this team,” said Usher. “I will be actively involved with the Cavaliers on many levels, including the game experience and our role in the community. I plan to spend a lot of time with the Cavaliers and look for Cleveland to be my second home town.” (Source)

I’m sure Gushers did this to reclaim whatever small bit of masculinity he had left before marrying Maneka. She probably has his ass wearing a French maid outfit with a feather duster in hand to knock the dust off that vajayjay that has pushed out about thirteen kids, the oldest of whom is probably Usher’s age.

Doesn’t this quote from him remind you of when you were in middle school and kids ran for government? Talking about they’re gonna make the food cheaper, there will be Red Kool-Aid in the drinking fountains, condoms in the bathroom, etc. etc., even though the whole damn school knows they ain’t gonna do a thing but approve or veto the streamer colors at the dance. Maybe he can pick out the fringe on the cheerleaders’ skirts?

Posted by J

Popularity: 42% [?]



Corbin Keeps It Trill

25 02 2008

There’s another interview floating around with Corbin Bleu from a Swedish Magazine. I really don’t care about Corbin or know anything he does besides be in High School Musical and apply Ebony Fashion Fair products on a regular basis, but these interviews of his are too hilarious to pass up. The quotations are outrageous! Sometimes I think it’s someone posing as him to make him look bad.

Some highlights:

Do you believe in spirits?
“Yes, I’m absolutely sure there is something else out there. And if it’s not ghosts, I guess it’s angels or something. I remember once when I woke up and all my toothpaste was outside the tube. Maybe someone joked with me, but I got really scared.

Tell us a secret!
“I love to get [a] massage! As an actor I’m always traveling, and it’s hard to get time for myself. Even if I’m not at work I can never be alone since there are fans requesting photos and autographs. But when I get massage I get the possibility to relax and think in peace. Fabulous!

When was the last time you were grounded?
“Two years ago. They took my phone too. That was hard! I came home really late from a party, much later than the time they said. I didn’t mean to, I fell asleep at a friends house.” (More)

LOL @ spirits taking all his toothpaste. What?! And massages are “fabulous”. Mmm’hmmmm.

He stayed out late at a friend’s house, O RLY?! I’m not even going to go there because it’s almost too easy.

Posted by J

Popularity: 26% [?]