Well, SOMEONE’S Gotta Pay For Her Album Promo

10 04 2008

SMH. I never thought it’d come to this, but Chilli’s slangin’ bootleg bags, y’all. No, they aren’t the Prada knockoffs you can get on Canal (that would be better), these are some bags with blank canvases that you can personalize. I thought Michael’s trademarked this like fifty-leven years ago, but I guess not.

Bags by Chilli’s personalized photographic handbags allow you to advertise yourself, your loved ones, your hobbies, your passions, your travels, your artwork, your company or anything you desire–it is all up to you! Put yourself in the designer seat and decide what you will walk around advertising everyday. The Bags By Chilli logo is not displayed anywhere on the outside surface of your bags. There is only a discrete interior label. (MORE)

First of all, it’s “discreet” — “discrete” is a math term. (/end English major rant) Second of all, “Bags by Chilli”? Really? If she was gonna go this route you mean to tell me she couldn’t have come up with something better than that?

Look, I know she is coming out with a solo project and she was signed to Akon’s label for awhile — maybe she still is, but maybe she needs help paying for the promo. I’M NOT MAD AT HER BEING ON HER GRIND. But come on, you’re Chilli of TLC, I know y’all went bankrupt in ‘96 or whatever but I’m sure you have some “No Scrubs” money lying around. A customizable bag company? I really didn’t think you’d go out like this, my dear.

Posted by J

Popularity: 30% [?]

Kelly Rowland - Comeback [full video]

8 04 2008

I’m on my fifty-’leventh post for today, so I’m bout to call it a day on this one. Between seeing this baby on Sandra Rose… Read the rest of this entry »

Popularity: 18% [?]

ShaNe-Yo Writes For A Trailer Park Mother

24 03 2008

My homegirl ShaNe-Yo is a such a talented songwriter that he can write from anyone’s perspective, even a bimbette with a couple screws lose from too many hours under the fake’n'bake. That’s right, the man who brought us “Irreplaceable”, “Irreplaceable the Male Version” “Go On Girl”, and “Irreplaceable with Chris Brown saying ‘Boo’ a lot” “With You”, along with production team Snoozegate have come up with a song for Lindsay Lohan’s new album. I’m going to go ahead and bet the ranch (my studio apartment in South Gate) that this song is going to have a lot of acoustic guitar in it.

Ne-Yo works with many stars, but also turns down a lot of them. There is simply only so much he can do. So, that he worked with Lindsay is a big deal. From MTV:

“Lindsay Lohan’s people said, ‘We would like for you to put a song together for her.’ I just viewed it as a challenge. I don’t know how to write for Lindsay Lohan. I don’t know what Lindsay Lohan is doing right now. But it’s a challenge, so I’mma give her my best. I gave her a song, and I think they really, really like it. Me and [Norwegian producing team] Stargate put something together, and she likes it.” (Source)

Turns a lot of them down, O RLY? Who exactly has he turned down? The only person who works with more artists is Lil Wayne and that doesn’t count because he’s so drugged up he’d work with a Peregrine falcon for the right amount of pills.

None of the rest of us know what Lindsay is doing right now either. I’d wager a guess it has something to do with a nightclub and coke, though. Maybe Ne-Yo can put together an acoustic guitar melody about the residue left in your nose after a long night of partying. Annoying!

Posted by J

Popularity: 19% [?]

Larry Fish Is Still Eating… And Eating Well!

14 03 2008

Laurence Fishburne at the 2008 ShoWest Awards photographed with Jodie Foster and Kate Bosworth. When I first saw this picture I was like, OK, who let Steadman into Mama Tina’s Spicy Creole Closet of Death? This is outrageous! The Joker called and he wants his steez back.

Just because Larry hasn’t been too active lately it hasn’t stopped him from putting some hibernation weight on. Get it! Get that food, Larry! I ain’t mad at this at all because he doesn’t look that bad — clothes aside. I think he’s still eating off Cowboy Curtis. That “PeeWee” money stacks deep, get familiar.

(Photo Source)

Posted by J

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Popularity: 44% [?]

“Basketball Is The One With The Hoops… Right?”

7 03 2008

Usher has become a partial owner of the Cleveland Cavaliers.

“I am excited about becoming part of this ownership group and this team,” said Usher. “I will be actively involved with the Cavaliers on many levels, including the game experience and our role in the community. I plan to spend a lot of time with the Cavaliers and look for Cleveland to be my second home town.” (Source)

I’m sure Gushers did this to reclaim whatever small bit of masculinity he had left before marrying Maneka. She probably has his ass wearing a French maid outfit with a feather duster in hand to knock the dust off that vajayjay that has pushed out about thirteen kids, the oldest of whom is probably Usher’s age.

Doesn’t this quote from him remind you of when you were in middle school and kids ran for government? Talking about they’re gonna make the food cheaper, there will be Red Kool-Aid in the drinking fountains, condoms in the bathroom, etc. etc., even though the whole damn school knows they ain’t gonna do a thing but approve or veto the streamer colors at the dance. Maybe he can pick out the fringe on the cheerleaders’ skirts?

Posted by J

Popularity: 43% [?]

Ri-Ri Named Youth Ambassador of Barbados

22 02 2008

Welcome to da island, wha’ gwan! Gal get you a haircut and ya set, ya dun know.

Fresh off her Grammy win last week, R&B/pop star Rihanna has been named an Ambassador for Culture and Youth in her home country of Barbados.

According to The Barbados Advocate, the Def Jam songstress was given the title by Prime Minister David Thompson at a tribute concert held in her honor last night (Thursday, Jan. 21).

Thompson said that in light of all of Rihanna’s recent achievements, including her Grammy award for the smash hit “Umbrella,” the singer should be formally recognized as a positive role model and source of inspiration for the country.

“I really don’t know what to say,” Rihanna said upon hearing the news. “I am so grateful and I have never been more proud to be Bajan.”

The 20-year-old star, whose full name is Robin Rihanna Fenty, also got a Land Rover and a diamond bracelet from some of the event’s sponsors, along with a birthday cake to celebrate her birthday this past Wednesday (Feb. 20). (Source)

She doesn’t know what to say because she hasn’t been programmed for it yet. ER-ROR, ER-ROR!

Erin and I have been talking about all weekend how Rihanna lucked up on this haircut — right place, right time — and now people are just knocking themselves the hell out to give her what she wants. I can’t hate too hard because she seems like a sweet little fembot but damn, a Range Rover and diamond bracelet, really? Isn’t there someone who still lives in Barbados that this so-called youth group can hook up? Rihanna probably gave the Range Rover to her weed carrier and uses the diamond bracelet as a bike lock with all the money she made off “Umbrella”.

Posted by J

Popularity: 48% [?]

Mario Says “F*** It” And Goes For That Check

20 02 2008

Mario will star on the next season of “Dancing With The Stars”, which, in case you weren’t sure, pretty much sums up the status of his career as a singer. Um. Yeah.

Showing that he’s more than just a voice, R&B star Mario is set to show off his footwork on the ABC hit reality series “Dancing With The Stars.”

According to the Baltimore Sun, the 21 year-old will be a part of this season’s new cast, which will see Mario and 11 other celebrities working on their dancing skills. The show, which will debut on March 17, is in it’s sixth season and was the second highest rated show of 2007, behind “American Idol.”

In addition to the young crooner, the show will also welcome famed Olympic figure skater Kristi Yamaguchi, tennis star Monica Seles and actor Steve Guttenberg, among others. (Source)

I mean, shoot, I ain’t mad at Kristi Yamaguchi. I’m sure that Olympics endorsement money is just about SAPPED. DRY. But Mario? I mean I know he’s not Usher but isn’t he selling himself a little short here? Or am I giving him too much credit? I don’t know. Or care, really. “Cryin’ Out For Me” was my cut, though. Apparently not many other people felt the same.

Posted by J

Popularity: 50% [?]

Amerie Movin’ On Up To The East Side

19 02 2008

Here I was counting her out after she got dropped from Columbia Records, but I hear Amerie is Def Jam’s newest signee. Wow! Not that I think she’s ever going to get promoted correctly here in the States, and there’s plenty of Def Jam chicks who never got a chance (paging Megan Rochell!) but it sure beats the situation Kelis and Mya are in. I’m sure they will have her singing hooks on every shitty rap album that comes out in the next year before they shelve her but hey, she’s still getting that money.

Amy is my girl so I’m happy for her. Good luck sexy!

Posted by J

Popularity: 24% [?]


19 02 2008

LOL dude is on his constant hustle and all without being a D-Boy. Say what you want about Tyler Perry, but he’s wiping his tail with dolla dolla bills while the haters are calling him corny or WHATEVER. I’m NOT MAD AT ALL.

This Madea doesn’t rest. Tyler Perry will create, write and executive-produce a series of half-hours presenting his Mabel “Madea” Simmons alter ego as an animated truth-teller. The untitled project (”Tyler Perry’s Untitled Project”?) would wind up on a network, on DVD, or both.

Perry’s objective is to take Madea, whose frank ways were born in a stage play before being fashioned into a series of box-office hits (the next of which hits theaters next month), and make her more kid-friendly. “I wanted to do something more appropriate, and this seems to be it,” he tells the Reporter. (Source)

LOL @ “kid friendly.” There isn’t a black child on MLK Blvd. in Anyhood, USA that doesn’t know who Madea is! Tyler’s character has become ubiquitous with black/urban theatre and has set the standard, despite the fact that he wasn’t even the first to do it (See First Sunday and David E. Talbert).

Who woulda thought a man dressing up in a dress and talking “country-ish” would make him a millionaire a couple of times over!? Tyler keeps a lot of non-descript black actors/actresses and some even currently relevant negroes working.

Shoot…where’s my dress…it’s a recession. It’s either that or marry a Saudi Princess and move to Dubai…but I like America too much for all that.

“Meet The Browns” comes out next month too? Get.that.money! If you haven’t seen “The Marriage Counselor,” his latest touring play, please do if you can. It’s HILARIOUS, and there is this YT girl in the play that.can.blow.

Posted by The IPS

Popularity: 23% [?]

Get That Money Where You Can, Girl!

13 02 2008

For the second time in her career, Mya will star in Chicago, this time in the Broadway version of the play. She previously played Mona in the 2002 film version, but will take on the larger role of Velma Kelly starting in May.

The sexy songstress will lend her vocal talents to the role of Velma Kelly, the cohort of Roxie Hart, played currently by stage veteran Bianca Marroquin.

“It’s something I always wanted to do; sing, dance, act and tell a story,” Mya tells the Associated Press. “It’s probably the ultimate complete dream for me.”

Mya is reportedly going through a strenuous workout plan, which includes cardio, muscle strengthening, and stretching to get ready for her new part.

“I have gone through all the material with the show’s musical director and everything is suited for my key,” she said. “We don’t have to do any transposing. It’s perfect.”

Her nine week Broadway run at the Ambassador Theatre begins May 12 and ends July 13. (Source)

I’m happy for Mya. This is a big deal and probably pays good money. Most of all, it fulfills her passion. Homegirl needed to catch a break after her album only came out in Tanzania.

Posted by J

Popularity: 37% [?]

Video: Sneak Peek Of Deion Sanders’ Reality Show

1 02 2008

LAWD, I posted about this a while ago, thinking “surely, they jest!” Well, no. Color me as wrong as Keylolo’s blonde locks!

They are going to be airing a 22 minute “SuperSneak” peek during halftime of the Super Bowl on Sunday on Oxygen, and it’ll also be streaming online at www.oxygen.com. *sets the Tivo*.

Please tell me this fool does not ride around his house on a SCOOTER. I’m so dead and buried in Ted Manson’s backyard, WTF LOL! Here I was calling my Big Mama lazy for making me come from the other side of the house to “get her some water.”

His wife though? Hellloooooo, she fine! She got kind of cut arms too. I LOL’ed when he ran over the decoration on the ground. “What is that supposed to be?” “It’s an ‘I’ Deion.” “Oh, I thought it was a goal post.”

*dead & crankin’ dat with the angels*

Posted by The IPS

Popularity: 36% [?]

Milk Does A Rhi-Bot Body Good!

31 01 2008

Ratchet’s favorite chick Rhi-Bot (LOL kidding, I had to steal that!) does a “Got Milk?” ad.

The picture is fly as hell, though I am wondering bout the yellow nails? Oh well, like Stacy & Clinton say, “It doesn’t have to match, it just has to GO!” OK, so I guess it goes with the furniture. Rihanna is cute, I’d smash (in 5 years).

The copy on the ad? Now that’s another issue. It reads:

“Drink it in. Pop star? Not exactly. Milk is more my move. Some studies suggest that teens who choose milk instead of sugary drinks tend to leaner and the protein helps build muscle. So, shut up and drink.”

The OBVIOUS joke was “shut up and drink.” I mean, whoever wrote that needs to be let go and sent back to Hallmark cause that ish is just corny. And this line: “Milk is more my move.” Now, I’m no English major, but that doesn’t flow right to me. Was that supposed to be “de island talk gwan guhl” coming out or some ish? Iono.

I think having black people in these ads is retarded because most of us are lactose-intolerant. Holla @ me with a Lactaid ad bishes!

Posted by The IPS

Popularity: 38% [?]

Khia Gets A Record Deal; Prisoners Rejoice The World Over

15 01 2008

Khia got a new record deal.

Kim is too busy using T-Pain’s voicebox to put out a new album, Remy is about to go away for a nice bid and be cell mates with Foxy, who can’t even put on her Lee Press-On’s to go to court in a timely manner. What does that leave? KHIA! Sloppy seconds anyone?

Female rapper Khia, best known for her 2002 single “My Neck, My Back (Lick It),” has inked a new recording deal with Atlanta-based Big Cat Records. After releasing her debut LP, Thug Misses on Artemis Records in 2002, Khia took the independent route for her two subsequent projects. “Signing Khia to the label was a no-brainer. Everyone knows who she is. She knows how to make a hit and we are happy to have her on board”, Big Cat President Mel Breeden said in a statement. The raunchy MC’s first project on Big Cat will be her third solo album, Nasty Muzik, which is due out this spring. The first single, called “What They Do” featuring Gucci Mane, is scheduled to hit radio in February. “I am extremely excited about my new deal,” Khia said of her new venture. “My third album will definitely show my growth as an artist and producer [GIRL STOP!]. I’ve been through a lot and my lyrics will prove it.” (source)

Who knew Big Cat Records was selling enough Gucci Mane “Freaky Girl” ringtones to get they paper up enough to sign The Thug Misses! Great day in the morning! Just what I been waiting for — a new Khia record. Put that right below my wish for Katt Williams’ new record & Fonzworth’s new single “R.A.I.N.B.O.W.S.” or w/e LOL.

I think Ms. Peachez was ROBBED. “Fry That Chicken” gets more play on my iPod than “Snatch The Cat Back.” I’m just saying.

“What’s Beef? Beef is when the b*tch titties looking like they sleep / Beef is when the clothes lookin’ like dirty sheets” - Trina, “What’s Beef?”

I’m going to send my cousin that’s locked up Khia’s new promo shots and box of cigarettes. That’s sure to brighten his day!

Khia column game is poppin’ though. Maybe I should start me a column LOL!

Posted by The IPS

Popularity: 19% [?]

DMX To Pay $1.5 Million For Lying About Rape

14 01 2008

Remember when Earl was all up in Sister 2 Sister Magazine last year saying that he got raped by a woman and that’s how she got pregnant by him? Well she can sit back, relax, and get that Cradle 2 the Grave money because a Maryland judge has ordered him to pay her $1.5 Million dollars for defamation of character.

 According to the New York Post, last Friday (Jan. 11) Prince George’s County Circuit Court Judge Thomas Smith awarded Monique Wayne over $1.5 million in damages as a result of her claim that DMX caused character defamation in a magazine interview.

As SOHH previously reported, in a 2006 interview, DMX, whose real name is Earl Simmons, told Sister 2 Sister Magazine that he was sexually assaulted during a one-night-encounter in 2003.

During the damages hearing, Wayne testified that X’s comments in the article were a lie, and the judge also heard testimony from Wayne’s sister and psychologist. DMX failed to appear at the hearing.

The award includes $518,400 in compensatory damages and $1 million in punitive penalties, according to Wayne’s attorney, Stephanie Moran.


 Posted by Erin T.

Popularity: 18% [?]

Marlon Wayans Set to Star in ‘GI Joe’

8 01 2008

Reports have surfaced that Marlon Wayans is set to play the lead character in the new GI Joe film, slated for release in 2009. Wayans will play the character of Ripcord, who takes over as leader from previous GI Joe vets like Duke, Flint and Hawk (no word if these characters will appear in the film).

I ain’t mad! Get that summer blockbuster money, Tiffany Wilson! I hope they do this movie like Transformers and make it worthwhile and not mess it up too much.

Posted by J

Popularity: 22% [?]