Sound Byte of the Day

17 04 2008

What is the most misunderstood thing about you?
That I’m a desperate aging starlet (who) does desperate things for attention. That always blows me away - “Well her career is almost over, that’s why she is doing this” My career is very successful, and I have other chapters that I am going into. And stop believing everything you read on the internet! And stop making up stuff and putting that on the internet…and check your facts. Don’t be happy to hear about another person’s downfalls. Let’s stick together and not tear each other down. -Aunt Vivica, star of Three Can Play That Game (Yes. Yes.) in Upscale Magazine

Props to UrbanScanz

Posted by J

Popularity: 11% [?]

Ms. Keys Covers Blender

11 04 2008

Alicia Keys is on the cover of next month’s Blender talking about her “breakdown” that she always alludes to and never elaborates on. Homegirl has been on the cover of fifty-leven mags since As I Am dropped in November and I still don’t know what made her go ~crazay~. Maybe this article will be different. I doubt it, though.

She looks a little tired here and like they just smeared that lipstick on her face while she was waking up or something. The forehead looks like it got the Mary J. Vibe treatment, too. Still, she looks pretty damn good.

Posted by J

Popularity: 41% [?]

Terry Howard Does Giant

31 03 2008

[Image Source]

When I first saw this I was like “Why is dude from ‘The Game’ on the cover of Giant?” I don’t know who should be more embarassed — Terry for the amount of airbrushing/”shadow” effect (shout outs to Mary J.’s 411 cover) on this or me for knowing who’s on “The Game”.

So he needs the love of a good, clean woman. I think I know who’s ready to step up and fulfill that role. Ladies, it’s probably not too late to get in your bearding resumes, though, so get that money if you need it, I ain’t mad.

I realize I’m nitpicking little details today, but how can Lyfe Jennings be the most underrated superstar of anything? Wouldn’t being underrated make you NOT a superstar? They need me to copy-edit that mug.

Posted by J

Popularity: 16% [?]

Mariah In Parade Magazine

19 03 2008

Apparently Parade Magazine is the new place to just “let it out”. Where have I been?! The last time I read Parade I think I was looking for a coupon or something. Does it still come sandwiched between the funnies and the real estate section? Is it longer than 7 pages (with ads) now?

Mariah took a bunch of “G-rated” pictures and I must say she looks a lot better here than when she’s showing her ass (literally) in some hoochie gear from Wet Seal. She also told them she’s “eternally 12″ and apparently she’s eternally a broken record too because I can’t keep track of how many times she’s said this. Check out the interview here.

A GANG of pics after the jump, plus peep Mimi’s new album cover over at DListed.

(Image Source)

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Popularity: 33% [?]

Lauren London Covers Jewel Mag

19 03 2008

Lauren London covered Jewel Magazine. I’ve never heard of this mess and it looks like one of those prom magazines but I ain’t mad because Lauren looks great.

A mess at the rest of the articles in this issue.

Peeped at Bossip

Posted by J

Popularity: 28% [?]

Alicia Keys Covers German Cosmo

14 03 2008

Alicia Keys looking tired as hell on the cover of German Cosmopolitan. She still looks good but there’s something about this picture that screams “TAKE THIS MESS ALREADY SO I CAN GO TAKE A NAP!”

(Photo Source)

Posted by J

Popularity: 42% [?]

Apples & Tip Get Artsy With Trace

28 02 2008

Erykah Badu and Q-Tip covered Trace Magazine’s April ‘08 issue for their art special. This shit reminds me of an LTD album cover my parents used to have, and I mean that in a good way! Ms. Badu looks great here, real fresh in the face, so much so that I’m going to avoid a joke about that Spirit Halloween Store wig falling off. Oops, does that count as a joke? Whatever. And Tip? He’s my dude. I just kind of wished they decided to redo the Janet Rolling Stone cover and have Apples covering Tip’s bitties. Just a thought.

Speaking of Badu, AHM! reader MissOMyGoodnezz shared a gang of goodies she got from attending a performance and album signing Erykah did in Dallas, TX. That exclusive material will be posted on here shortly, so stay tuned.

The picture was given to us via e-mail but originated here. Thanks.

Posted by J

Popularity: 42% [?]

Not A Good Look For Snoopy Dawg

14 02 2008

What in the name of Michael, Paris, Prince & Blanket Jackson is going on!?

That’s just a negatory sir.

I don’t know who styled this cover shot, but they made Snoop look like a Velvet GangstER.

They didn’t even downplay his rodent-like features. * smh *

All that Roscoe’s Snoop eats, WHY is he so thin. He’s giving me plenty of Winehouse with that arm, it’s kind of scary. And his sexy smirk side-eye is just all wrong.

I vote no! How about this month everyone goes & buys a copy of Wall Street Journal. Let’s shock the clear people! LOL.

Spotted at Nah Right

Posted by The IPS

Popularity: 53% [?]

Rihanna Covers Cosmopolitan

11 02 2008

“Your Va-Jay-Jay”

* dies and cranks dat Winehouse with Tyrone Biggums *

Putting her on this cover with all those sex-related bylines was just NOT a great idea. Really!

I bet Jay-Z has sex with himself when Bey’s on tour dropping down low and sweeping the floor with it to Rihanna too, though he was trying to front last night like he didn’t *snickers*

I wonder what Rhi-bot looks like sans-Photoshop. We got to respect her now ya’ll. She is a GRAMMY AWARD WINNER. *SEOD to the Recording Academy*

Posted by The IPS

Popularity: 21% [?]

3 Stacks Covers Complex

31 01 2008

I can honestly say I’m a Will Ferrell fan, but I’m not sure I care about this movie…Andre’s acting in the past isn’t really making me jump and be like “OH SNAP I GOTS TO SEE THAT!” He hasn’t done enough to drag me to a Magic Johnson Theatre juuuuuust yet. Not saying he’s bad or nothing.

All I do know is that Will Ferrell looks like Mr. Rogers. “Won’t you be my neighbor?” Oooooh, afternoon delight!

If you care…

Posted by The IPS

Popularity: 30% [?]

D. Woods Got To Rock That Cut Twice!?

29 01 2008

Click for full-size

Oh you KNOW there was some hate in the blood in the Diddlybops house (yes, that is their new name)! They must have had some competition in the house or something to compete for who got the other cover solo, since I just posted the group shot yesterday.

Again, I will repeat, D. Woods is thicka than a snicka. I’ll have two please! Girl looks good.

However, that fuzzy hair helmet mullet cut is NOT the business. It’s like a bang gone wrong! It even looks like the long side of that hair is pulling her head down crooked ROFL. I mean, REALLY, everything from the neck down is RIGHT. That hair…lawdhasmercy!

I think Aubrey told her “that’s cute girl!” and was trying to sabotage her since she got stuck wiping the crust from around Diddy’s mouth while Wanita/Juanita/D. Woods (don’t act like we don’t remember yo real name!) was oiling up her legs for the King shoot.

I didn’t see Making The Band last night, I told ya’ll I had a hot date! LOL. How was it? Should I be watching it or do I need to just delete it from the Tivo to make room for American Idol tonight & tomorrow? LOL.

Posted by The IPS

Popularity: 27% [?]

Danity Kane Cover King Magazine

28 01 2008

I’m just glad no one is on a bed with they booty tooted up! Who knows what Diddy is thinking these days…

Aubrey’s tittayballs are SO fake, ugh, WHY!!??. I love me some D. Woods, she thicka than a snicka, but that hair looks like she fell asleep in the stylist’s chair and woke up just in time to save the other side. Dawn looks 25% SPESH with that smirk LOL. She’s a cute girl too with darker hair. Shannon looks like Madonna with that leotard thang. They call her “the mom” since she’s married and thangs, but DANG…I guess they intend to make her dress/look like it too!

Andrea can do no wrong in my eyes, sorry LOL.

I’m so excited about their album, I hope it’s good *crosses fingers*

Posted by The IPS

Popularity: 32% [?]

Jordin Sparks Is Not Winning So Far

20 01 2008

Spotted at Kevipod

Jordin Sparks covers Your Prom magazine.

Now granted, I’m probably not the target demo for this magazine, but dang…I feel like she’s been “squished” onto the cover or something LOL.

How they just gonna demote ole’ girl from “American Idol” to “Prom Idol”?! I wouldn’t have let that copy go to press.

Her CD hasn’t been doing to hot, and she seemed to fade from the radar pretty quickly…and with Ruben Studdard, Taylor Hicks and Katherine McPhee all being dropped/leaving their labels, is it safe to say that A.I. has just become decent television but is losing steam as far as being a “star factory”? Even I don’t want to watch past the audition phase anymore.

Her CD was hmmmmm…BAD…even a duet with Chris Breezy couldn’t save it. I’d have to check the Soundscan, but wasn’t her CD the lowest selling or debuting project ever for an American Idol winner?

Posted by The IPS

Popularity: 19% [?]

Mr. Hightower Cut Off His Hightop

17 01 2008

Steve Harvey is 50(1), Fly, Flashy and….bald.

Ya’ll know that was a toupee’ right? LOL. His edges were as sharp as a 12 year old’s. Boy stop!

Steve looks great though! I’m not mad one bit. He is getting that money, and you can’t hate on a successful black man that doesn’t play basketball, sell drugs, or have hoes.

*points at self*

Ladies, if Mr. Hightower’s picket fence grin just ain’t enough for you, you can check out him & his new wifebeater swagger over at his website. Wipe HIM down Ceddy Ced!

Posted by The IPS

Popularity: 32% [?]

Rihanna In FHM Russia or Germany?

11 01 2008

Spotted at ONTD

“I can’t stand the rain! Against my window!” - Ann Peebles (NOT Missy Elliott, thanks!)

Wow, this is what R. Kelly must feel like when looking at a Seventeen magazine. Well, maybe not, cause I feel dirty and wrong and he probably wouldn’t.

My academic, respectful side says the over-sexualization of our young women has got to stop!
My loins & inner man say yes plz with a side of helllllloooooooooo tittayballs! *cough* Sorry.

This is for you Bref_Stank LOL! I see you my dude!

Ri-ri is getting bold in her old age LOL. I guess Suga Sweet Daddy Jay said that she needed to push another 200K units on his way out the door at Def Jam or she would have to “eat the cake.” He put her on the hoe-stroll in Russia Germany- like we wouldn’t see or find out! Gotta love the internets. Click for full-size pictures. Slight nudity, may be NSFW.

Edit: Some folks say this is German and that these are Photoshopped. *shrugs* LOL.

More after the lumps jump!

Posted by The IPS

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Popularity: 41% [?]